this blog will hav no pictures of me.. of my life now.. because this will be a real diary.. where tears cannot be seen but feelings can be felt from merely words. i never knew wat blogging was for til * introduced me.. then we started our very own blog. (: the sentimental me took it seriously.. i have never ever loved anyone the way i love *. but of course whats the point? only i know this. * wil leave me. i know it. its anytime now.. but i hope its a lil bit later.. my heart cannot take it... i planned my future.. with *.. but i simply am not good enough. when will i ever be?.. i know wats the truth.. that i have alway been loving some1 who doesnt love me back.. i just kept telling myself.. * will love me.. * will change for me.. every time * tells me i love u.. i opened my heart n believed *. now.. * wants 2 let me go so badly.. cheated behind my back for 5 times within 3 years.. but now.. my heart still says.. give * a chance.. Ada.. are u really so desperate? are u really so stupid? ar u really so worthless? ... yes i am all dat.. i just wan * to love me.. * will never know how much i love *.. cause * is letting me go.. after the event.. or even before.. i will b just Ada.. and it'll be like our roads never crossed.. do i regret? yeah i do.. i regret not bein able to meet * earlier.. and prevent *'s first love.. then mayb my lov story would hav been a good one.. now? Ada, please stop crying yourself to sleep.. you've been having fever for a few days.. if u wan 2 die.. do it faster. dont suffer.. wait, not a good idea.. *.. can u hear me? my heart is screaming for u now.. but of course.. u never could hear me.. i am by your side always but u never noticed.. i wan to stop feeling this pain. i dont mind being hit by a car. right now. hit me.who am i u must b wonderin.
dear diary.. i am Ada.
this blog is my message to mr cupid.
----to cupid,
let me feel wat is love.
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